Showing posts with label Relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Relationships. Show all posts

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Can You See The Resemblance?

BF: "Hey! You just walked over the subway grate! Like it was a real floor!"

Me: "Whaaat are you talking about. I only avoid them when I'm wearing heels."

BF: "No, you never walk over them. You don't think of them as solid ground."

Me: "Actually, you are confusing me with Toby."

To clarify, Toby is the puppy we took care of for my friend Josh while he was away a few weekends ago. Before he left, Josh told us Toby never walks over subway grates because, and this is a direct quote "He doesn't think of them as solid ground."

Friday, December 12, 2008

Because You Can't Ctrl Alt Delete Your Love Life

I was loading pictures on Facebook recently and go to the "Trust" or "Don't Trust" option on the uploader. As I moved my mouse over to click Trust like I always do, without hesitation, I thought to myself 'Why is this such an easy decision?' I mean part of it is because one time when I hit Don't Trust I had to restart my computer to get it to work again, because it apparently saved Don't Trust in its memory. (I guess after you Dont Trust something once, you should probably not trust it again.) Why is it so easy for me to hit Trust on a computer but not in my life?

If you have ever dated me, been friends with me, or known me even a little, you'd know that I have a teeny tiny issue with trusting people. And Don't Trust always comes along with its best friends — Jealousy and Paranoia, which is so much fun for whoever they are latching on to.

I suppose I can easily click Trust on my computer because I have a Mac, and they rarely get viruses. So why can't we program ourselves to be more Mac-like? We could be so amazing, that viruses wouldn't even penetrate us. They just wouldn't exist in our godly Mac-like world. Or, if you are just too PC to function as a Mac, why isn't there spyware we can download to protect ourselves from the asshole viruses out there? Our spyware could give us messages: "Warning this boy might be corrupted. Recommendation — Do Not Proceed." And we could have emails that we send out to our friends, you know? "This boy has been known to break the hearts of multiple girls. Once downloaded, he takes over the girl's thoughts and then erases their memory and self esteem while overriding any other previous boys — er, files —. Please fwd to your closest friends so that they don't download him."

Although, let's face it — that would probably just end up increasing his downloads.